Sunday, February 27, 2011

Oscar Diary 2011

Who Won, Who Lost, Who Should Have Won

7:29 - Oscars about to start. Quite anticipating it this year, 'The King's Speech' vs. 'The Social Network' will be an epic battle for all time. Also, how freakin' smooth is Tom Hanks? He may not have the 'cool' factor of a Jack Nicholson or Robert Downey Jr., but I bet he's a blast to hang out with. I wanna fix up a house with him someday.

7:33 - Pretty sweet, opening montage. I think it's funny this year that I am blogging about the Oscars when the movie I want to win was the movie that completely revolutionized social networking. If not for what that movie's about, then I probably wouldn't be writing this right now.

7:39 - Pretty funny opening host montage. Better than last year actually, and I thought last year was pretty good. Let's hope their monologue is just as good...

7:42 - This is awkward. Please no actual family members at the show. Sorry mom, but if I ever host the Oscars they are getting an actor to play my mom on the show.

7:47 - Tim Burton - Still undefeated. Wow, at least this guy didn't expect to win, did he really have a mad hatter hat perfectly fitted for the statue? Yes ladies and gentlemen, somebody actually spent time to make that.

7:58 - .....and the winner is...? Wow Kirk Douglass is taking a really long time to get this out. Best Supporting Actress - Melissa Leo - The Fighter. 1/1, I don't necessarily agree but can't complain, she did well. I don't think that's actually Melissa Leo, did you see that clip from 'The Fighter'? She is hot in person, is this her stand in?

8:02 - Cue the music, sorry Melissa Leo, but get off my stage.

8:03 - Has anybody ever had a complete turnaround like Justin Timberlake or Leo DiCaprio? How many teenage boys hated both of them in the late 1990's and now want to be them? Include me in that.

8:06 - By the way, James Franco must have some good weed cause it looks like Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake were toking on that before presenting.(-->)

8:16 - Best Adapted Screenplay - Aaron Sorkin - The Social Network - 2/2 ladies and gentlemen. Definitely deserved, phenomenal screenplay. Good for Ben Mezrich to get some recognition too, he has been pumping out good true/fiction stuff for years. Way to give proper credit to Fincher. Play that music as loud as you want, Sorkin don't care. Get you some Aaron.

8:18 - Best Original Screenplay - David Seidler - The King's Speech - 3/3, I am on fire now. Predictable though (side note: looks like Javier Bardem got some of Franco's pineapple express, who the hell was he pointing at?)

8:27 - I feel bad for all the poor baby spiders that were senselessly murdered to make Anne Hathaway's eye lashes tonight. (<--)

Look at how freaking awesome
this beard is
8:30 - Best Supporting Actor - Christian Bale - The Fighter - My first miss of the night (although I did pick him as a dark horse). I think Bale won strictly on his beard alone. Bush league Bale - promoting Dicky Eklund's website. Could this be the first of 'The King's Speech' upsets, does this mean 'The Fighter' could sneak up and win Best Picture? This is starting to smell like 'The Hurt Locker' over 'Avatar' last year... (-->)

8:45 - Best Original Score - Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross - The Social Network - I didn't pick this category but I am very happy TSN won, absolutely well deserved.

8:53 - I am genuinely perplexed at this point as to who's gonna win best picture. TKS had all the momentum but is getting mostly shut out, TSN is winning some technical one's as is 'Inception' and 'The Fighter' has already won two acting awards. No matter who wins, this is the best race in years.

8:56 - Marissa Tomei is like 45 and she still looks amazing. Good for her. (<--)

8:59 - Best Makeup - Rick Baker - The Wolfman, easiest slam dunk of the night. How can you not vote for Rick Baker?

9:00 - Tim Burton - Still undefeated.

9:02 - My comment about Tom Hanks earlier? Ditto for Kevin Spacey.

9:06 - Is it just me or is Disney just ripping off it's own earlier songs? Haven't we heard these songs before?

9:13 - Damn you Jake Gyllenhaal. (-->)

9:19 - I think that guy was who Franco bought his weed from (live action short winner). (<--)

9:20 - Pretty funny auto tune songs from movies this year. This confirms it, all presenters and hosts are definitely high.

9:29 - How many times do you think Billy Crystal dies her hair per day? I put the over under at 11.5.

9:31 - My comment from 9:20 has just gone on a retweeting spree the likes of which I haven't seen in my time on Twitter. Seriously, it's been retweeted like 6 times in 10 minutes. Is this my 15 minutes? This could net me another follower at some point.

9:35 - 'Inception' is killing it. Leading all movies at this point.

9:37 - Best Editing - The Social Network - Believe it or not, this is actually one of the solid predictors for Best Picture. Could it be, could the momentum have really swung back to The Social Network? Stay tuned...

9:45 - Gwenyth!!!!!!!! Ladies and gentlemen you're unintentional comedy moment of the 2011 Oscars is here. This is vocal castration.

9:48 - Best Original Song - Toy Story 3 - Randy Newman - best part about this was Jennifer Hudson. She looks amazing. Way to subtlety drop the fact that you have been nominated 20 times Randy Newman. Wait, how many times have you been nominated again?

10:03 - I still can't believe Hillary Swank has won 2 Oscars. Is she really one of the greatest actresses of all time?

10:04 - Best Director - Tom Hooper - The King's Speech - The Academy can lick my underparts. Total joke pick. Fincher and Aronofsky were incredibly more deserving. Usually this is one category the Academy gets right but they got it way wrong this year. Awful. Just Awful. I'm starting the strikes back up, this is strike one Academy, you've been put on notice. I am now 3/5.

10:10 - Seriously. My night is ruined. Fincher deserved that award so much. TKS will take Best Actor and Picture now. Best Picture will be strike two for the Oscars, 2 strikes in a year is big even my Academy Awards standards.

10:19 - Best Actress - Natalie Portman - YES!!!! Besides the fact that I called this and she deserved it completely, now we all get to see the gorgeous Natalie Portman on stage! The Academy gets one right. I am 4/6.

10:28 - Best Actor - Colin Firth - The King's Speech - I knew it but I still didn't want to believe it. All this means is that Jesse Eisenberg will win in 20 years for a role he doesn't deserve it for to make up for this snub (side note: if they were giving this award based on who's the highest at the Oscars, Franco would win hands down). I am 5/7.

10:38 - Best Picture - The King's Speech - Of course. We all saw this coming. That doesn't mean that it's not effed up. The Academy is short sighted and the system needs to be fixed. Winners tonight have talked about how they're glad the Academy recognized it's about the art. That is a blatant falsity. The Oscars, like everything else, is all about the money. It's official, I have lost all faith in humanity. Strike 2 for the Oscars. This was so predictable, couldn't they throw us one surprise?

Final Thoughts: I espoused my thoughts up above. My major connections this year, the nominees that I really wanted to win, were Natalie Portman and David Fincher. Portman was a shoo-in, however, Fincher losing to Tom Hooper?!?! Can somebody tell me who the eff Tom Hooper is? He shouldn't even have been nominated, it should have been Christopher Nolan and now he is walking away with Fincher's award? This was just plain awful, the last few years the Oscars had done it well and got the nominations right this year, but it was still awful. I think I may have finally reached the point where I no longer put stock in the Oscars, if it's a good movie, it's a good movie, I don't need people who paid a lot of money to get their film to win, to tell me what's good or not. My night is ruined and probably my week. Why do I care about this so much? Maybe I will write a post on this at a later date, but right now, I have nothing left to say.

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